Wilson's Little Black Dress
by JazzyCriminologist
Summary: House makes a midnight run to Wilson’s place and walks in on something very unexpected. Warrning: HouseWilson. Contains cross dressing.


**Wilson's Little Black Dress **

**Rated: **PG 13? shrugs It's not too bad, but it does have questionable themes. yay! I love those!

Summary: House makes a midnight run to Wilson's place and walks in on something very unexpected. 

Characters/Parings: House/Wilson

Author Notes: Yep, that's right, this has cross dressing in it. So if you don't like it, go away. And just as background I wrote this because we were talking about cross dressing in the House/Wilson part of the House boards and I complained that there wasn't enough cross dressing slash House/Wilson fics. So I decided, at 8 am, that I'd add to the deficiency of it!

Oh, and I still don't own any bit of House. But I'm working on it.

And yes, I know, I need to write the last chapter of Closet Case! I'm just…avoiding it. But I haven't forgotten. I will get it done eventually.

------HW------

House frowned into the wind as he rode his bike down the street. Street lights flickered along the way as House swerved between what little traffic there was at midnight. He had finally snapped. He knew that idiot was still living in that hotel and needed someone to smack him the hell out of there. And hey, just because House didn't mind being the one to do it… not that House was thinking about it. Or at least not all the time. Ok so maybe just work. And home. Ok so he'd thought about it a lot.

As he turned into the parking lot of the hotel, House looked around until he spotted what he was looking for—Wilson's car—and pulled his bike up next to it, turning the engine off before swinging his legs over and off. House was about three feet away from his bike before he relized he had forgotten his cane. With a muttered swearing directed at numerous people and things, the when back and snatched up his cane.

With a grunt House made it to the door of Wilson's apartment and came to a stop. Reaching into his back pocket he pulled out a small hotel key. He grinned to himself a bit. Leave it to House to seal his best friend's room key _just in case_ he needed it. But before wondering in he put his head to the door, trying to tell if Wilson was still awake or not. House smiled as he hear what sounded like Wilson talking to himself, something House had noticed he did a lot when alone and working on his paperwork. House rolled his eyes—leave it to Wilson to be working on paperwork at midnight on a Friday.

"Honey, I'm home!" House exclaimed as he barged into the room. But before House could say anything else House saw Wilson and couldn't help but laugh at the irony.

"We're you waiting in that dress for me to walk in and say that?"

Wilson stood flustered in front of one of the mirrors of his room, mouth agape slightly. He was in a black cocktail dress that ran from just above his knees up to his chest where the dress's fabric gathered up and hung down (something meant more to show womanly cleavage rather than a man's lack of). It took Wilson a while before he could snap out of his horror of House walking in on him in a dress. "This is Julies. I must have just accidentally grabbed it when I got my things before I left" Wilson rattled off.

House just raised an eyebrow. "And it took you a year to find it?"

"Um…" Wilson drew out the non word, "Yeah?" he tried pathetically.

"So you just slipped and then suddenly, oh snap I'm in a dress?"

Wilson sighed. "No. I didn't slip. I put it on House."

House rolled his eyes. "Well duh. That's why I was being sarcastic about the slip. You take out all the fun Wilson," House grumbled, but still very amusedly, as he walked over to the single bed of the room and took a seat. "So, why exactly are you in a dress?"

With a sigh Wilson turned to face House, leaning up against a dresser and looking down. "I…I guess it just relaxes me somehow." Wilson suddenly felt like an idiot for that explanation. "I mean… have you ever worn a dress?" He looked up at House as he asked his question with a sheepish look of embarrassment, but a hint of laughter in his face.

House gave him a look. "Sorry, I stay under that sign that says men's in the store."

Wilson shifted awkwardly as a silence started to grow between them.

"So where did you get that thing?" House said a bit later, obviously having mulled over what he would ask his friend next.

"At the mall." Wilson sighed

"Did you try it on there?"

Wilson looked at House with a weird look. "No, actually."

House tilted his head, looking to Wilson as if he was showing interest. "Then how's you know it would fit?"

"Uh…" Wilson searched for an answer in his head that was anything but the real one.

House's eyebrow's flew up. "This isn't your first dress, is it?"

"No…" Wilson let out with a puff of air.

"Well… at least you can pull it off."

"Yeah I—what?" Wilson was nodding slightly until he realized what House had said, suddenly feeling his cheeks burn up. "I pull this off?"

"Well it's not like I've seen…any guys in dresses before… but yeah, you do." House said with a nod as he tapped his cane into the ground.

Wilson started to smiled as he looked at House, who had suddenly found the carpet very interesting.

"Are you saying I look good like this?" Wilson asked while grinning smugly.

"You've got a stain in your carpet that looks like the Dali Llama." House said as if Wilson hadn't said anything.

"You do!" Wilson exclaimed as he pushed up off the dresser, moving forward a bit.

House looked up at Wilson with a look in his eyes Wilson had never seen before. "You never asked me why I was here."

Wilson blinked the furrowed his brow. "Why are you here?"

"Why are you here?"

"House, I'm not in the mood for one of your games."

"No, why are you here, at the hotel? You might as well live somewhere less Dali Llama stained."

Wilson rolled his eyes. "And you know somewhere without Dali Llama stains? I didn't think such a place existed."

"My apartment is Dali stain free."

Wilson's eyebrow's lifted up in a bit of surprise. He had a feeling this would lead here, but was still surprised with House. "You sure? I could of sworn your couch had one right on that third—"

"Oh shut up Wilson. I want you to move back in, ok? You're being an idiot living here. Hell you're farther away from the hospital here!" House snapped out, cutting off Wilson mid statement. House stood suddenly. "Now hurry the hell up and pack your things."

Wilson blinked. "So, I'm guessing that means I have no choice in the matter?"

"Nope, none. I'll be down at my bike. Hurry up, it's not nice to let a tired cripple wait for his friend out in the cold."

Wilson grinned as House left, moving fast to pack away what few things were out of his bags, leaving the room only a few minutes later. As Wilson tossed his things in his car he heard House laughing at him. "I know I said, without saying, you look hot in a dress but isn't it a bit cold out?"

Wilson turned to look at House confused then realized he was still wearing the dress. He let out a groan. He had completely forgotten about the dress in his hurry to get out. But Wilson soon forgot his embarrassment as he suddenly felt House's breath against his ear as he spoke, "But I guess it does make for easy access. And because you look so damn good in it, I'll let it slide." House smirked as he walked over to his bike and got on. House looked over at Wilson then laughed. "I'll meet you at the apartment. By the way, if you didn't know already, dresses don't do a good job of concealing things at waist level." House laughed again as he started his bike and took off, leaving Wilson wondering what he meant.

"Waist level, what the hell does that—" Wilson glanced down and suddenly noticed a slight jetting out of the dress. Wilson groaned. "Oh god damn it" Wilson swore as he got into the car. He rolled his eyes as he stared his car. "Nothing beats a hard on in a dress caused by your friend at midnight…" he grumbled then laughed with a smile as he drove off towards the apartment.

------HW------

Comments are love. And this is just a one shot. But you people are good at guilting me into things xP


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